Girl Does Madrid

Hasta Luego Madrid...

2008-07-25T12:40:00.000-07:00

So I acknowledge that in 7 months back in Madrid I´ve had even less than one post a month, while after spending 3 months in Moldova I had enough material to possibly publish a book. In any case, it´s goodbye time once more. I have been accepted to a Master´s program in Trento, Italy and I move there on Tuesday July 29th. And i´m heading there ready for a change of mind and lifestyle. Some student life in the middle of the mountains should do me some good, and hopefully inspire me to write more. So I´m starting yet another blog: http://trentotime.blogspot.com/ Enjoy!
In any case, as for Madrid... goodbye words... again? Not many. It´s a good middle place. Easy to come to, and easy to leave too. It will be here. And I´m sure I´ll be back too. Maybe the time spent in a smaller town in the middle of the Italian mountains will make me see things differently.

Lonesomeness

2008-05-08T02:15:00.001-07:00

I have been spending a lot of time alone lately. And I don't mind it, I actually enjoy and look forward to it. Every time I have to decide whether I will stay at home or go out with people, I tend to incline towards the first and dread the second choice. I simply don't feel like socializing, because I enjoy my own company better. I think it might be a problem though, since it's hard for me to even go out with my boyfriend or closer friends. And I'm moody when I do.
Last time I stepped into a nightclub was in April. Last time I actually danced, very long ago indeed.
Where's party and socializing me? Where did I lose her?

Civilized vs. Uncivilized

2008-05-08T02:13:00.000-07:00

Madrid (and Spain) is full of elderly people. But I need to differentiate something now: old and elderly people. Elderly people is the correct term for all of those above 60ish. Old people is the name I give, despectively, to all annoying people over 60ish. To all those old people that walk around with their canes and don't care or apologize if they hit you. To all of those that push you to get on the bus first. That demand you move from somewhere because they want that place. That when they walk, they do it slowly and take up whole sidewalks in a way that you can't get past them without stepping onto the street full of oncoming cars or dog shit. That get ahead of you in lines because they “can” (and the can, because nobody says anything). All these are examples of old people.
What's the difference then? Well, elderly people ask saying “please” and respond with a “thank you” when you gladly do what they asked (You know, what they taught us as babies....). What's more, when I see elderly people I don't even wait for them to demand a seat on the bus, I give it to them gladly because they don't demand anything. They say “I'm sorry” when they hit you with a cane, and I say “Oh, don't worry, there's no problem!”. If they're tired from waiting in line, and they ask to cut ahead, of course I will say yes and I'll do it with a smile.
I wonder what makes people past 60 so different in the ways they act. I assumed that some people gladly age while living a fulfilling life, whereas others fought with old age, never reached for their dreams and absolutely hate the wrinkly beings they have become.
I'm aiming for the first one.

Overanalyzing

2008-04-27T03:15:00.000-07:00

Months have gone by since I´ve seen Mr. Italian.
I say "seen" because we never formally were "dating" so therefore we never formally "broke up". Curiously enough, after a brief relationship in Madrid he invited me to live at his house for a month in Italy, and then called me every week while I was volunteering in Moldova. But yes, that could in no way be called a relationship, could it?
In any case, months have gone by since we exchange any type of communication, but yesterday, oh suprise, I received an email. As it happens every time I receive an email from him, I almost pooped myself. Why? Well, one night he drank too much and checked his email and since then I "saw" his password and I once in a while log in to his email to see what his up to. Before, because I cared, but nowadays, out of routine. So I always have this paranoia that he will realize this and that one day I will receive an email telling me what a creepster I am/can be.
Good news was that the email was not denouncing my ocassional creepiness. It was to invite me for a coffee. Sometime mid-May. When he´ll be in Madrid. In short, he wants to see me. He worded it this way "I wanted to have a coffee with you so I can update you with everything that has been happening in ..... (his town). Even though I´m sure you don´t care. PS: Isn´t your birthday around this time?" (Yes, my birthday is one day before the day he arrives... he remembers?). So here it goes... THE OVERANALYZING!

1)Why is he emailing after being silent for 4 months?
2)Why does he want to have a coffee? And not a meal, beer, drink, etc.? Coffee sounds so "proper". I can count the times I had coffee with him. They were all in the morning after partying until very late.
3)Why does he want to have a coffee to tell me about something that he thinks I wouldn´t care about?
4)What makes him think I don´t care about what has been happening in his lovely hometown? (In any case, I would have assumed NOTHING would have happened. It´s one of those VERY old and small Italian towns)
5)He remembers my birthday?

I still haven´t answered. I have to think of a very quick and smart retort. Something that will say "maybe" and at the same time intimidate him. Without being directly mean or rude. Just to confuse him. And only because i´m mean, and I like to think too much. And I´m sometimes creepy.

Where is time?

2008-04-11T12:23:00.000-07:00

Time... It seems I have less of it here. In certain places, I seem to have too much of it. I´m not sure if it´s either positive or negative, but here I have very little of it. Not enough to do everything I would like to do. Including sleeping.
Since time goes by so fast, my life does progress, but each goal achieved seems small because they are one or two from many. I find myself having to pause, see what I have done, pat myself on the back, and continue. Otherwise I just end up frustrated and sad.
But so far, so good. And i´m glad and grateful to be in this continent leading a productive life. I´m happy when the sun shines and I run down to the panaderia. Or when I have to go to 4 fruterias to find a ripe avocado. Or when I can cancel class and just sit at the park, dipping my feet in a fountain.

2008-01-24T09:11:00.000-08:00

What Really Matters

2008-01-24T08:54:00.000-08:00

It´s funny how I found myself back in Madrid, and two months went by without me having any time at all to publish a post. I cannot lie to myself: I´m sure I´ve had the time, but, not the motivation to go write about my crazy adventures.
Then, yesterday something happened. Something that made me stop and think about things. It´s something simple and rather frequent in Madrid: my purse was stolen. In it, there was: an ipod, a digital camera, my cell phone, a flash drive, an extra shirt (just in case!) and about four lip glosses, amongst other things. Most people get very mad over these things, but my desperation and anger lasted about 5 minutes. I realized it was useless to try to do anything about the purse and my things, I told myself "It´s only material things" and I just kept on dancing until the wee hours of the morning. Then I went to sleep on a friends´ couch (my keys were in my purse... so I couldn´t go home), but not before jumping over the fence of the royal gardens to "take a shortcut", and releasing our bladders by the fountain. The full moon made it kindda romantic (not really). But these memories made the night a good night after all.
This morning I woke up, and with only my metro pass on me, I headed to work. I don´t think I´ve ever walked around Madrid alone and without my Ipod on. It was like a whole different world around me. I actually felt liberated, and thankful for having lost it so I could now experience something new. Then I thought: The digital camera is replaceable for little money, I always buy the cheapest phone available so i´m not worried about that, the flash drive is cheap too, the ipod was a gift from my ex so I never actually invested any money... Losing these things was not as bad as it sounds. The only thing that makes the loss hard is all the phone numbers I had stored, all the text messages I saved, all the pictures I took, and all the things I wrote in my daily notebook...
And then I realized what really matters. And I decided to start writing my blog again.